As Gov. Sanford confessed his affair during a press conference yesterday, he made a comment I found very revealing. He said that “God’s law is indeed there to protect you from yourself.”
I have a friend (who I’ll refer to as Pat) who was raised in a traditional Christian household. Pat was taught that pre-marital sex was wrong–so wrong, in fact, that those who engage in pre-marital sex will go to hell. Pat told me that Sunday school teachers would drive this point home in detail, explaining what it would be like to burn in hell.
Not surprisingly, Pat was terrified of pre-marital sex. Also not surprisingly, Pat ended up having pre-marital sex. Pat now has some pretty confused ideas about sex and about self. Pat has also had trouble forming relationships.
I think this is the mode of faith Gov. Sanford was referring to when he spoke of religion as something that is there to “protect you from yourself”. Some people, certainly not all people of faith, are afraid of themselves, of their human passions and feelings, of sex themselves. They learn that sex is bad, and they believe, like Gov. Sanford, that religious laws are intended to repress human passions and feelings–because, the implication is, human beings cannot do this on their own. They believe that fear can help them to be good.
This approach–the idea that faith can be based on fear, that religion means repression of self–obviously doesn’t always work. It didn’t work for Gov. Sanford. It didn’t work for my friend. It didn’t work for Sen. Ensign.
Joe Lieberman once said that morality is impossible without religion. I disagree–I think human beings, with or without religion, are capable of understanding that extramarital affairs are wrong, hurting and embarrassing your loved ones is wrong. But one thing is clear: religious faith does not guarantee morality. Another thing is clear from Gov. Sanford’s remark about God’s law. We ought to be asking questions about a fear-based view of faith that has affected every aspect of politics from stem cell research to marriage equality for gay and lesbian couples to policy in the Middle East. What does it mean to teach people that fear ought to make them good? What about abstinence-only education, a policy choice flowing from a fear-based view of faith? It teaches people to fear themselves, fear their bodies, fear contraception, but, of course, does not actually stop people from having pre-marital sex.
Perhaps something positive can come from Gov. Sanford’s statement about faith and fear. It’s time to make policy choices based on reason and common sense, not on a fear-based view of faith that, especially when it comes to sexual matters, leads to bad policy choices. It’s ok to be human–people make mistakes, as Gov. Sanford did, as we all do. It’s time for people like Gov. Sanford to stop insisting that Americans live by a religious code that aims to make sexuality taboo.